Re-Assembly 4.0

image via stephan herrera

THE MAKING OF A PODCAST

I love how the Universe sets you up to step into your power without your knowing. You encounter tiny bits of experiences that seems ordinary but in reality, they are puzzle pieces divinely coming together to create the destined big picture that was always meant for you.

Earlier this year, I was invited to be a guest on the podcast, Liberty for Her. This invitation was delivered with small trace amounts of anxiety as I have a “thing” with taking pictures, being filmed or hearing my voice. I was confronted with having to face two out of three of the things I hate the most but I accepted the guest appearance with an open mind.

I really don’t remember the moment when all of this anxiety adjacent behavior emerged, as there are plenty of pictures from my childhood where my cheshire cat smile is spot on! I’m sure it’s linked to some deep dark shadow self that hasn’t revealed itself but that’s a rabbit hole I’ll explore in another post.

This was the first time I had ever been on a podcast and I didn’t know what to expect. I spoke with Nada, we had a quick chat about the intention of the episode and why she choose me as a guest. I then received a list of possible topics that would be discussed, which was great because the thought of delivering well thought out answers on the spot makes me want to throw up.

The pre-podcast process was a pleasant experience, as I was able to reflect on the topics and learn some new things about myself that I would have never explored. In the end, Nada highlighted my authenticity and how it plays an important role in my brand as well as my life. It was healing to absorb how others see you in this world. We’re so busy challenging ourselves and judging our actions that we don’t take the time to celebrate our progress and soak in the small wins that we accomplish every single day. I realized that I never gave myself credit for being me - a consistent me that shows up everyday and continues to move forward in spite of my daily obstacles.

On the day of taping, I made sure my iPad was fully charged, my curated background was well curated and I calmed my nerves with a quick meditation and breath work.

One, two, three action - the taping proceeded and we had a great conversation about Angela Mayhoe | KNIT and the pivots that were necessary for the business to stay a float during the pandemic as well as how I was creating a brand while honoring my authentic code. Overall, I felt inspired afterwards and was so happy that I was open to expressing my thoughts in new ways and building community with like-minded people.

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Rewind back to October 2018, Stephan and I decided that we should create something together. This was a random thought that spilled out into our martinis one night on the sofa while I was visiting Portland. We realized that we’re basically the same person with similar end goals and the thought of not collaborating was completely insane.

After our stint in high school, we both packed our bags, left Houston and headed West. However, our destinies were positioned on different tines when we reached the fork in the road. I landed in Los Angeles with a sketch pad and dreams of becoming a fashion designer, while Stephan headed to Portland to become an advocate for the LGBTQ and BIPOC communities through his community outreach. We re-connected on Facebook (if I’m remembering correctly) and discovered so much similarities that we had to visit each other’s world and explore. We discovered that our creative paths have had this parallel tango for the past 20 years and that we were currently facing the same obstacles.

After more conversations and life-changing perspectives, we concluded that we could not be the only over 40’s that were in this debacle. We had spent what we thought were the “magical years” of our lives (20’s- 30’s) devoting ourselves and talents to build other brands while remaining stagnant in our creative selves. We were completely steeped in fear and the possibility of inserting our livelihoods into the curated existence that we sought after was a distant dream that could never be brought into realization.

Our process was slow and steady as we encouraged each other to dismantle our situations and start building a path to our true selves. I got conveniently laid off and was able to start Angela Mayhoe | KNIT, while Stephan left his 9-5 and started his consulting company. It took a year for us to nurture our new situations and to stop freaking the fuck out! Although we were doing what we love, at times, the levels of uncertainty were so high that we would become paralyzed and consider reverting back to our old ways of ignoring our creative desires that was constantly pulling us to jump. However, once the veil was permanently lifted, we knew that our mission was to continue to inspire each other, began the process and circle back to aid others that were going through the same experiences.

That thought, morphed into a safe haven for creatives over 40 who want to re-assemble their lives into their passions. Within the year, Re-Assembly 4.0 was birthed and we had a brand! When we finally narrowed our intentions on what our identity was going to be, the global pandemic swung into high gear and knocked us into an unknown abyss that slowly syphon our motivation only to spit us out onto weekly happy hour Zoom calls.

Then Stephan got this great idea to start a podcast! We began to speak into existence, a platform that could spread the word of our ethos while continuing to do the work. It took a beat for us to get in the groove of actually mapping out a plan, tapping and then re-tapping episodes and finally editing the first season.

So, this is where we currently are, completing our editing efforts, creating copy and betting it all on Black. I decided to share this with the world to set my truth free and reveal the transparency of facing fears, creating new realities and jumping off of the fuckin’ cliff yet again.

When is the an actual launch date, will there be a Season 2, will people hate it, will we be showered with encouragement, I have no idea. Either way, we are putting it out there and being open to the learning experiences that awaits us.

Even at this stage, I am celebratory of our accomplishments. I have already grown into a new version of myself and my bond with Stephan has been solidified in trust, vulnerability and authentic support.

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Courage is something that is practiced and built over time while taking many fear starting steps in the process. So here’s to courage, consistency and a future launch date of Re-Assembly 4.0!